This weekend one of my husband’s friends sent him a meme that included a picture of a guy with an enormous cock. It was quite humorously done. I made the comment about the guy reminding me of the first guy I dated after my divorce, which prompted the inevitable discussion around cock-size. My husband is modestly endowed. I call it the Goldilocks Cock as it’s ‘just right’. Why do men have such an obsession with big cocks?
“Do you miss that at all?”
“No! Dude, it hurt! Fucking him was like fucking a porcupine!”
“No! Really! I like your cock!”
I’m sure there’re women who love them big. I’m not one and I’m not petite, I’m almost 5’8”. A nice, average sized cock makes me very happy. I don’t need super-sized toys either. I indulged him with a Bad Dragon for a bit when we played Alien Abduction but I finally put a stop to it as it became ouchie and not the fun kind of ouchie. Realistically, menopause may have a part to play in that but still – no. I don’t need a big cock, I don’t need a big dildo, and, unless you’ve got freakishly small hands, I don’t need to be fisted.
Sex with a seriously endowed man:
Oh baby, look at that thing… Oh let me suck on it, oh yeah let me take it all, oh do me! Put it in! Drive it home! Deeper!!
Holy shit what the hell is that? What do I do with it? Let me suck it. I can barely get the head in my mouth, what the hell do I do with the rest of it? OK, let’s try it…easy! Easy! Use some lube! Slower! Not so deep! Give me a second! Owe! Owe!
How about a handjob?