First of all , thank you to all who have checked out my posts here , even if no comments or if you just skimmed through , thanks for checking it out . So, its Monday here and it's been a long drama filled weekend for me . Wont get into details, feeling kinda hyper and feel like posting more fetish rambling today. Let us run through the woods and not get hit by a tree , here we go . Once I found out what worked for me to pop during masturbation , it was an easy ride so it seemed . It seems to be that audio works the best for me , simple talking , certain song lyrics with the right trigger words was the starting point. Big set of headphones on so no one to could helped to conceal ones interests . When younger use to mix a lot of recordings of various audio to basically make a jerk off tape to listen to . I found by listening to audio , it heighten the pleasure , made the fantasy more exciting and allowed my mind to dream of anything . Once in awhile would add some pics and maybe a video and off I went . I have been fortunate enough to meet a few fantastic women online that shared similar interests and kinks and allowing me to listen to they talk out a scene that we both agreed on and was fantastic and enjoyed every minute of it . I was one of the guys that waiting a long time , I mean lllllloooonnngg time before having an actual sexual relationship, the 9 month surprise scared the shit out of me and even with protection , didn't want the risk , plus never found anyone who really connected at that point . Let's just say first time was not good and basically popped the cherry and moved on from there . After a time of thought, I realized I was kind handicapped by only focusing on certain triggers and waiting too long for an actual physical relationship. The audio was more of a crutch to say the least . Even till this day my wife doesn't get it . But believe me , she does things that make me wonder what God I pleased to have her as my wife . Up to this point I still have not had to explain to her kids what the 2 big cases are downstairs , which I hope I never do. Turn in tomorrow for part 2 of this discussion of what makes this guy tick. Happy Monday to all those who celebrate it.