For a couple of years now my wife, Sharon, and I have enjoyed going out for breakfast on Sunday morning. There's a couple of local places that we go to that do a great job on a specialty coffee and then have some entrees that always catch our imaginations whether its eggs, pancakes, or French toast. We usually like to get up and out early so as to beat the after church crowds.
This past Sunday was an exception. Instead of getting up and showering, I just rolled over. Sharon nudged me and said, "Are doing we breakfast or aren't we?" My response was, "I don't think I'm very hungry this morning." This is so unlike me, so Sharon asked if I was OK. I gave a half hearted "yeah", but she wasn't convinced. Finally, after some prodding I admitted that I had not been to the bathroom since Wednesday morning.
Sharon was aghast and uttered "So you're just really constipated. You know what that means." And at that she leapt out of bed and headed for the bathroom. Yes, I did know what that meant and could hear the vanity door opening and closing followed by the running of water. I knew that I was going to be getting an enema. Soon, and just like when I was growing up, I was called to the bathroom, told to take off my pajama bottoms, and knelt on the floor in the knee-chest position. Sharon hung the bag from the middle hinge on the door, lubed my butt, and inserted the pipe. I was soon filling, but then I could sense enema leaking out from around the pipe and I was hit with a bad cramp. After some back and forth discussion about whether I could take more or not, she removed the pipe and had me get up to expel. I held out for as long as I could before expelling the single huge turd. Sharon looked at the mostly full enema bag and told me that that is what only a pint of enema produced and that I had to take the rest.
So back to knee-chest, a relubed butt, and a reinsertion of the pipe. This went a lot better and I finished the bag. When I finally got to expel it was significant volume, but being four days worth it was not a surprise. Sharon asked if I wanted another bag full. I must have hesitated too long with the answer because before I knew it she was refilling the bag. After taking and expelling that one, which I did without a problem, she asked if I was ready to go out for breakfast. I was.
It was funny how fast I did those enemas because we still had time to shower and get dressed all the while still getting to breakfast ahead of the church crowd.