Listen up people! Your AE reports stink! You’re The Avengers, not some peace keeping force. When we are called out it means things are dire. You’re not cops, you’re Avengers! Start acting like one.
Tony, back in the day your father developed a quick-setting epoxy foam. The AEC used it to thwart high jackings of trucks carrying A-bombs. It glued the truck to the pavement. Revisit the formula and update it to use against mechanical foes. You don’t fight a tank by attacking its armor, you fight it at its weakest point - joints and tracks. Maybe put in an abrasive to wear down bearings. Just don’t get any on your suit.
Dr. Banner. Oh Doctor Banner. The Hulk is big, powerful and massive. Is it too much to ask to also include a little tactical strategy as well? Enough with the terrier with a rat approach. Use your size and strength quickly to neutralize your opponent. Pull the damn head off! Stomp on it later if you it makes you feel better.
Hawkeye, Natasha. You two do not have super powers. What you do have are incredible combat skills. Head shots, ladies and gentlemen. Hawk, I’ve seen you hit a ping pong ball at forty yards, same size as an eye ball. Natasha, your IPSC Hit Factor is the highest ever. Guys, don’t hesitant to use those lethal skills!
Captain, you’re what, ninety years old? You didn’t cold-cock the Germans. Don’t leave behind enemy combatants when clearing the deck. A bad guy with a headache and double vision can still kill you. Now before you get righteous, I’m not saying go full on Deadpool. Just ensure that when you take someone out they stay out. Less tossing across the room, more limb breaking.
Oh, and Thor, take some ESL classes.