I decided I wanted to count my fetishes and rank them by strongest to weakest and I figured I'd share it.
1. Medical Fetish (Doctor/Nurse Play)
2. Painful spankings (Pain & Spanking)
3. Painful shocks (Pain & E-Stim)
5. Submission (being submissive)
10. Domination (Being dominate)
11. Rectal temperature
The first 5 I would say are the most important for me, even though it's hard to draw a line. "Rectal temperature" was the last one I added to my profile, and oddly I never added Exhibitionism because that ties in so tightly with examinations and anything medical.
To me these fetishes overlap each other to some point. Especially 1, 4, 5, 6 and 7. Which merge into each other in such a way that it makes it hard for me to explain it to even myself. There is a certain feeling I get when asked to get undressed and wear a hospital gown, and it is especially exiting if I have to do it in front of the nurse and if I have to take my underwear off too that's even more exiting. And I can't really put that feeling into words. But it feels like a combination of being exposed, submissive and nurtured. And thinking about it feels SO good! That experience seems like it combines 1, 5, 6 and 7. Being restrained has a similar feeling to me combining 1, 4, 5 and 6 and that feels like being submissive, nurtured, secure, safe and comfy. It just feels so great. And being someone interested in how we think I tried to put my feelings into words only for words to seem to fall short. It's not easy to even explain what I feel and why to myself regarding this. In the beginning of my story Committed I imaged myself as John being put in the restraints and that's how I came up with his inner dialog. Obviously.
It says in chapter 2 of Committed, "I also allow myself to realize that I am feeling nurtured and loved. Yes, the johnnies, the restraints the locked seclusion room, that all feels so cozy, nurturing and pampering. There taking care of me. I’m submissive to them and that almost feels like I’m there little baby being taken care of."
So it's losing control and being forced to be in someone else's hands and control. But does that cover all of it? I'm not sure. Well the being exposed is humiliating and humiliation is feeling that you are below so they are in charge and you are submissive to them which means they are caring for you. So I think I can see how those kinks tie together.
I guess it is about letting go of responsibility. Even punishment ties into the submission. So I guess all 11 of my fetishes all tie together in some way. And the domination one is the opposite where I am doing this for someone else. For me being in the submissive role is having the dom do all this for me. And the attention part, can't leave that out. And domination is doing for the submissive. So the dom role is taking care of and the sub role is being taken care of.
Like I said on my profile, "I recently realized that my dominant and submissive tendencies are just from me wanting to love nurture, and be loved and nurtured."