Eric extends his hand, "Nice to meet you, Eve. Wow this is pretty fantastic. I wake up naked in a tub. No scars or anything. God took that rib and surely didn't even leave a mark. God is good." Eric looks at Julia's face and breasts, "God is VERY good!"

Julia raises her eyebrow, "So, Adam, God told you he took your rib? Why did he do that?"

"He said he needed it to make you."

"Where did he get the rib to make you?"

"Oh, he didn't need a rib, he just blew on some dirt and I popped up out of it. Pretty sure he did it on purpose. You know the saying. God is good."

"Yes, I have been here 30 seconds but it does sound vaguely familiar."

"Anyway, Eve, you look fantastic, really, really fantastic. God promised me a perfect companion and he DID NOT disappoint. God sure is being good to me right now. Eric shouts to the ceiling, "Thanks again, Lord!"

"Well, Adam, I am just going to have to take your word for it. I really have no way of looking at myself. The water makes me look like a rippled blob."

"I'm sure, God, will get around to that at some point. After all, he put us in paradise and gave us everything we could ever want. So, Eve, you must be pretty happy with the way I look. God told me we would be perfectly happy because he specifically designed us for eachother."

"Eh, your face looks, oh, and feels pretty scratchy. I am not going to lie to you, Adam. God floated me over here and showed me all the beautiful animals first. There was this beautiful fluffy one, I like to call Bear. Well, God said all animals are kind and friendly here, I was really thinking of cuddling with him tonight."

"No, no, no, you don't want to do that. None of the animals talk around here except the snake and God told me not to talk with him. Also, see that tree over there, I can't eat from it, it will give us forbidden knowledge.

"Wait, a minute, wait a minute. God has put you here with no one to talk to and then tells you not to eat from a tree that gives you knowledge or let you talk to the one being that you can have a conversation with?"

"Well, I trust God, he is being really good to me right now. Would you mind standing up and giving me a twirl? Oh yeah, very good, very smooth, open the hatch. I can't wait to find out what those two holes do and look you have a butt just like I do. Yours is MUCH prettier."

"Why, Adam? What does your hole look, like? Oh my God, Oh my God! Ok, you can sit down now. Let's talk about something else."

"Well, that sucks. God promised me we were a perfect match. You seriously don't want to suck my chest, balls, ass or toes?

"Ewwww, no, of course not, do you want to suck mine?"

"Eve, that is all I want to do forever. I was hoping this conversation would end in you enthusiastically wanting me to do that. It's almost like God is trying to punk me. God, God, I think Eve needs a reset!"

Julia splashes Eric in the face, "God is not going to reset me, You Ass, he gave us free will. That means we can do and feel what we want."

"Well, Eve, your feelings and wants are pretty hurtful. You know I could live with this foul brown crud shooting out my backhole, but this! Now, I know why God is good, but not great!"

"Ewww, will that happen to me too? Crud shoots out your backhole, does it stink?"

"Yes, Eve, for me it does, very horribly actually. I'm sure yours is probably delicious though, just like the delicious ass you REFUSE to share with me."

"Well, what causes it? Isn't there anyway to stop it?"

"Well, yes, actually there is. It's eating fruit that causes it. Evidently, God designed my body so it can't use all the food I eat and shoots the horrible waste out the back."

"Well, then, stop eating, Adam!"

"I can't help it, Eve, it tastes good and I enjoy doing it!"

"You are being so gross, Adam!"

"Well, I am gross, remember? I bet you won't laugh and point when Mr. Bear shits in the woods!"

"Look, I am sorry, Adam, let's start over. I like your pretty little toys floating in the tub. They are fun to squeeze."

"Yes, it is nice God gave me a couple of things I am actually allowed to squeeze."

"Adam, Adam, starting over, happy first impressions are important."

"Right, right, well. Maybe God is giving us these toys to teach us something. This one toy floats on water. This other toy shaped like a bird maybe it flies over water."

"See, this is great, we are having an actual conversation. See if I hold the bird shaped toy I can pretend it's flying and I can make bird noises with my mouth."

"This really sucks, Eve, these toys suck too. This is boring and everything sucks and my life sucks."

"Adam, I will let you smash that one in my boobs."

"Howwa howwa, How did you know I wanted to do that Eve?"

"Because, Adam, you looked at my boobs and then the toy and then my boobs like twenty times. I am able to understand your facial reactions because I look at your face when I talk to you."