“Another day without a client, damn, I thought this would be easier. Aw-uh, maybe a little hair of the dog; ahh, ya Canadian Lord Calvert…nectar of the gods… oh that’s good.” I walked out of my office and went down the hall to the bathroom. I needed a shave, and I didn’t smell none too fragrant either. I locked the door and striped to my waist, shaved and soaped up my upper body rinsed off and toweled myself dry. I had one last fresh shirt in my office closet. If I didn’t secure a client soon, I wouldn’t be able to make the rent in this rattrap.

9:05 a.m. and the phone finally rang, and I had a client on the way up here within the hour. When she came in the door I found out it was some bimbo looking for me to follow her husband and find out if he was having an affair. Hey…for $50 bucks a day, plus expenses, and she had a retainer of $150, I can be very accommodating and understanding, or at least act like I give a damn. I had her sign my standard contract. She didn’t have to know she was my first client, hell, I’m an experienced officer, or was, and I knew how to stake out a criminal…so a cheat…well that would be a piece of cake! Yes it was and in less than a week I handed her a dozen 8 X 10 glossy photos of her old man with not just one, but two different hideaway broads and they both looked like they’d been around the block a few times, if ya get my drift. He was getting something from them that he wasn’t getting from my client…but what did I care? Still I acted as though she was the one that was really getting screwed and I tried to empathize with her and I guess that paid off. She gave me a full week, plus a $200 bonus. But the case that was to make my career and alter my life path, not to mention my non-existent sex life came as a referral from my very first client.

A little over two years had passed since my very first client and business was going good enough for me to get a little place of my own-nothing fancy, mind you, but it wasn’t a dump either. I was even making enough to hire a secretary. I interviewed 7 young good-looking women that I knew would be trouble, when this old battle ax comes into my office and proceeds to tell me what I needed to do to make this business more professional, Angie De-Angelo her name was, but I just called her Angel and I could tell she liked that handle. Ya, I knew she was the help I needed to really get things going and she dug right in and went to work organizing all my files and making the office look good. The money started rolling in and I was able to rent the adjoining suite and turn that into my private office while Angel had the front for all of the case files, plus my library and her desk. In the very front, we had a couple of chairs and a little magazine table, which was Angel’s idea. She said it would give the clients the impression that they had to wait in line to see “the best private dick in the business”.

One day, Angel rings me over the intercom and says “Jake, there is a Miss Chloe Van-Marin to see you.” Then she whispered, “Boss this is a really high-class dame”. I was curious, but unfettered, and I said in a deep even toned voice, “Send her in Angel”. Angel opened the door to my office and in walked the most stunning women I had seen in a long time and she was dressed to kill for. Angel’s eyes were wide and she looked at me as though I was about to fall all over myself, so I said, “Angel take some petty cash and go to lunch down at Brizzards. Take your time and enjoy yourself and don’t be afraid to meet some of the clientele.” That place was crawling with well to do guys about the same age as Angel was and she glowed, “Aw Jake, you’re too good to me, thank you” and she closed the door, leaving me alone with the stunner. I stood up and walked over to greet her, extending my hand saying, “Miss Van-Marin, I’m Jake Dryden, how can I help you today?” “Well Mr. Dryden, you come highly recommended by my half-sister, Beulah Dansigler” she smiled, albeit coyly and reserved. “Ah yes, I remember her. She had a philanderer for a husband that I caught in the act, not once but twice, as I recall.” “Yes, that’s right, Mr. Dryden. The photographs that you took helped her through a nasty divorce that netted her most of their estate. She is doing quite well now.” She glowed. As much as I enjoyed chatting with an intelligent beautiful woman with an incredible hour-glass figure in a tight black full-bodied dress, I did need to run a business, so I asked in a deliberate low and slow voice, “Miss Van-Marin what is it that you need my services for?”

She looked at me as though the answer was not going to be pleasant, then she sat down and said, “Do you mind if I smoke?” I had quit smoking 15 years before and I didn’t like the smell, but I nodded my acquiescence, only because she acted like she needed it. She was, though, very sensuous in her oral fixation, as she gathered her thoughts and perhaps her courage. I suddenly thought that she needed an ice breaker so offered her a drink. “Bourbon, if you have it, with just a splash of water thank you”, she purred. I had a small refrigerator in the corner that had an ice box that held two trays, “Two cubes please”, she purred again. I poured her a healthy glass of Cream of Kentucky with ice and water and handed it to her, while I filled my glass half full of Canadian Lord Calvert and sat back in my office chair behind my desk and gently sipped as I watched her take a healthy pull and then another. Finally, she looked at me and said, “Mr. Dryden, something very private and intimate has been stolen from me. It is a priceless heirloom that I want you to find and return to me.” I said evenhandedly, “Just what is it that you want me to find, Miss Van-Marin?” Her eyes bore into mine as she exclaimed, “I assure you Mr. Dryden, money is no object!” She completed breathlessly. “Miss Van…” “Call me Chloe, please”, she interrupted and I continued, “Ok… Chloe…I need to know what exactly it is that you want me to find for you.” She almost blurted out, “Beulah said that you were very discrete. Can I count on that?” “Chloe, if I wasn’t very discrete, I could have never built this business, do you agree?” I asked and she rather absent mindedly said “I suppose you’re right.” I asked, “Do you have a photograph of what it is that you want me to find?” She lowered her eyes then drained her glass and mumbled, “In…in a manner of speaking…sort of…I guess that is what you might call it...more of a work of art…I suppose.” I made a one word question, “Chloe?” She put out her cigarette and put her empty glass on the corner of my desk. She slowly stood up, her eyes away from me and in a seemingly distressed tone that I instinctively read as aroused, she said “Mr. Dryden…please unzip my dress…I…I have to show you something.” “Well in that case Chloe, you should probably just call me Jake,” I said as I rose and came around to her. She put a hand on my face and made a pleading whisper, “Oh God, please be discrete…Jake…please.” She seemed to need something, but what it was, I couldn’t read, but I thought I could detect that she was both aroused and apprehensive. I brought her close and held her and said “Chloe, something brought you to my office today and now that you’re here, there is nothing that you need to be afraid of.” As I stroked the back of her neck, she drew herself into me and I realized that this was all woman…a man’s woman and after a few moments of this…I kissed her; yes, like some romantic fool, I kissed her full on the lips and she responded enthusiastically. When I released her I whispered, “Now what’s all this about unzipping this amazing dress?” She looked into my eyes and said, “I like this dress, but it’s nothing special.” I retorted, “I’m afraid you’re wrong Chloe. That dress looks absolutely amazing with you in it; nothing short of fantastic!” She shook her head slightly and her long flowing brunet locks whirled around her as she mused, “It seems clear, Jake, that you know how to make a girl comfortable as you take off her dress.” And smiling now, Chloe turned around and lowered her head allowing my easy access to the zipper high up on her back. I found it and as I put my left hand on her shoulder she sucked in a quick breath. “Are you still ok?” I asked and she hesitated for a moment and breathed, “Ooh..Ah just hold me for a moment Jake.” I wrapped my arms around her waist and brought her close to the front of me and I noticed immediately how much her incredible derriere jutted out as it came hard against my crotch, because my cock began to show the telltale signs of interest; ok so it has been a long time since I last had a woman…hey I’m always too busy.

She broke my train of thought as she breathed, “What do you like most about a woman, Jake.” I breathed back, “I like everything about a woman.” She sighed, “Oh Jake, I think that you especially like some part of a woman; you might like a little nibble at everything, but just what is your bread and butter?” What the hell, I had nothing to lose. This dame seemed genuine enough; why not treat her square up? I held her around her middle with my left arm, lightly kissed the back of her neck and slowly and deliberately reached down and felt her incredible ass; oh what an ass this woman had and I thought this is a woman that would do just about anything to please the man she loved. I heard her whisper, “Yes Jake, oh yes! Is that your bread and butter Jake?” Her dress was tight around her ass, but she wore no girdle…I was feeling her and she had a very sensuous posterior. I detected the cleavage of her large firm butt cheeks, and I slowly drew my finger up through it. “Oh Jake, you must be careful if you’re not sure how a woman responds to erotic stimuli.” She sighed and then uttered a guttural “Don’t tease me Jake, please.” It was time. It was time to unzip this woman’s amazing dress and see what secrets awaited me. I slowly worked the zipper down until the sensuously erotic shoulders were bare and her shoulder blades became visible. I lingered and kissed and then I began to audaciously wet-kiss her back, which caused her to moan. My hands went to the outside of her shoulders, as I slowly worked the front of her dress down around her firm breasts; my fingers danced over her pert nipples as she gasped in passion. “Oh Jake, please don’t take me to a place that I can’t return from this soon. I must show you…oh take my dress just a little bit lower Jake and you will start to see what I’ve been trying to tell you about.”

I slid the zipper down another three inches and a Golden Tattoo started to reveal itself. I took the rest of the zipper all the way down to the bottom of her back, but there was still more of the tattoo to be revealed. I slid her dress all the way down to her ankles and bade her to step out of it, which she did without questioning me. I kneeled down behind her in absolute awe. I slowly took down her sexy black lacy panties and dropped them around her knees. There before me was the most intricate and detailed piece of art I have ever witnessed. A golden enema bag with a gold and platinum band around the top, with a silver hook attached. A golden hose snaked out of the bag and curled around the lower part of her back to a large gold enema nozzle tattooed in the cleavage of her incredibly beautiful ass. At the 5th lumbar, a silver hose clamp completed the picture. I whispered, “How long have you had this, Chloe?” “I got it 16 years ago, on my 21st birthday. Have you seen all of it?” She breathed and I very gently touched the cleavage of her magnificent ass and whispered back in reverence, “I can’t see the end of it,” “Well Jake, since we now both know where your Bread and Butter is located, I can tell you that the next thing that you will see is solid gold.” She said in a deliciously naughty voice and then Chloe spread her legs wide, put her hands behind her and parted her deliciously lovely ass for me. The enema nozzle that showed in the very top part of her butt cleavage was only a small portion of the large contoured bullet-bat shape that went all the way to her anus, which was hairless. I pulled her panties back up and then I helped her back into her dress. As I brought the zipper back up into place, she slowly turned around and looked at me, then lowered her green eyes and whispered, “Do you think I’m perverted Jake?” “Listen carefully Chloe”, I began, “I spent 5 years in the SFPD Vice Squad and I know what perverted is and I can tell you that nothing that you have revealed to me comes anywhere close to being perverted. On the other hand, please sit down and tell me all about that incredible tattoo. Would you like another drink?” She sat there for a moment with her mouth agape, before looking away momentarily and then she nodded and said, “Yes, Jake, I think I need another one; make it a little stiffer this time.” I poured her a stiff belt of Cream of Kentucky, dropped two cubes in it with just a splash of water and handed it to her. She took a long pull and again her eyes went to mine and began to bore into my soul.

After a minute she spoke, “So…Jake Dryden, you don’t think a woman with a Tattoo like mine is perverted.” I made a silent gesture with my mouth pursed back, shaking my head and then said, “No Chloe Van-Marin, I don’t think you’re perverted…not yet anyway.” She looked at me as though she didn’t believe me and then said in a low sultry voice, “What if I told you I really enjoy enemas…what would you think of me then, Mr. Dryden?” It was time for me to take a long pull of my Lord Calvert. She couldn’t know of all of the real degrading perversions that I had come across while I was on the job, she could only dwell in her own special world of her conditional self-loathing. What had brought this drop dead gorgeously erotic woman to this state of self repugnance? Suddenly I had to know; perhaps I thought…maybe me and her…Christ! What was I thinking? This dame was way out of my league; she had money and she was educated and sophisticated…she had real class… so what could she possibly see in…Shit! Now she had me in my own special brand of self repulsion. I’m a great guy and she is obviously attracted to me…stay professional old buddy and don’t rush this…It just may all work out in the end; ya her rear end…come on old buddy get back to business. I leaned across my desk and matched her penetrating gaze and I said, “Maybe you’re not aware of this, Chloe, but it is not uncommon for actresses and models to take enemas. I have even heard of a few cases where they shared the experience with the men in their lives.” She still held me in her gaze but I noticed her mouth begin to show a slight smile. I continued, “In my world Chloe, we only catalogue perversions as something one person does sexually to another person, without that person’s permission and to that person’s detriment. What you have described is something that is not discussed openly in this society, but it is certainly not uncommon. What is rather uncommon, I would think, is that magnificently intricate and beautiful tattoo that you have. Tell me about it.” She sat back in her chair and took another drink as she gathered her thoughts before looking at me with, perhaps, a little awe, before she spoke, “Do I take it, Jake, that you don’t see my enjoyment of enemas as being a deviant sexual practice or a perverted act?” I rose from my chair and came around to sit on the front of my desk so I could be closer to her and took her empty glass and sat it to the side. Then, taking both of her hands in mine, I said, “Chloe, I want you to stop belittling yourself. You’re a beautiful intelligent and resourceful woman and I gotta tell you that I find you very erotic and nothing I have seen or heard scares me away. So let’s cut the self-loathing and get down to business, shall we?”

“Ok Jake, it’s just that…well every man I thought I liked has freaked out when they saw my tattoo…and I’ve been called a crazy perverted bitch too many times. Maybe…I hope that you’re…well different, somehow…I was hoping that you might understand…me, but I … I never thought…oh Jake, please don’t play with me…I just can’t…” I just had to interrupt her, “Stop it! Right now Chloe, just stop it! I’m the real deal here! What you see is what you get, baby! I’m not some fly by night that you can’t trust, God Damn it, my word is my bond and I don’t bullshit to my own advantage. So just for the record Miss Van-Marin, I like you and I’d like to see more of you, but you didn’t come in here to hear that, right? You came in here to hire me to find your stolen property and I hope… catch the bastards that stole it from you!” She began to brighten up and suddenly she smiled and said, “Ok Jake, where to we start?” “From the beginning” I said and I started the case file by asking her “Tell me about the significance of that tattoo from the beginning.” And then I took out a marker and wrote on the case file header: The Golden Enema