Mike is freshning up while Enid whips up a delicious meal. He bangs his head against the shower wall as he points the cold flow of the showerhead at his crotch. "Damn it, I am in my 40s, I'm not 14, I am going to have a lovely meal with Enid and not humiliate myself."

Mike silent squeals as Enid abruptly opens the shower door, "Dinner will be ready in five minutes, will be nice and warm and very yummy, so wash up faster!"

Mike puts on his best sports jacket and dress pants, and sits down to see a beautifully set table with fine china and crystal silverware. Chicken and mushroom wellington with a large juicy steak and a large apple pie with sharp cheddar sprinkled all over it resting between the two of them. Mike places the fancy golden napkin on his lap, "Enid, why? Why did you do all this? "

Enid shrugs,"I actually made most of it yesterday, today I just reheated it in the oven. My mom taught me to be an ok cook. She joked her cooking is the real reason my dad couldn't ever quit her... Mike, can I ask you something??? Why all the mixed messages?"

Mike genuinely looks shocked and finally snaps, "Are you serious?" Enid closes her eyes and nods her head back and forth, "Enid, after everything that has happened you can't see how I might possibly the one who is being bombarded with confusing messages?"

Enid folds her arms, "Oh really, me? Tell me a little bit about why I am so confusing to you."

"Sure, sure. Well to start out with, you save me multiple times in multiple ways that day in my office and even sit me down after saving me to ask if I am ok and give me a sandwich and a juice. THEN after feeling safe and cared for you unleash your sexy alterego, pull my pants down and spank me and give me uncontrollable erections like I had when I was teenager. THEN, your sexy alterego reveals she was merely kidding and returns to her angelic default setting. " Enid's plans were to be upset right now, but she is resting her finger on her cheek and using her others to hide her chuckle.

"Now, that this young overly attractive woman is being inexplicably sweet to me I am desperately calling begging for attention and can't stop. I try to explain to her how confused and insecure I am as to why she is being so kind and she gives me an unbelievably impossible weird social question asking me to GUESS which one of her friends has sexy thoughts about me.

Ok, ok, I try to keep the impossible game light and make sense of it all by analyzing from an objective point of view. THEN, this young, amazing sexy woman ups the ante tells me I am wrong and tells me what sexy things three of she or her friends said about me. She doesn't make me guess, but I am hoping any of the three comments are hers.

She rehomes me, says more beautiful encouraging things to me, and then reveals she loves a body part of mine. I scan my memory bank and remember her making a comment about one of my nurses wanting me to handle her unruly butt with my sexy hands...which is weird, because it sounds exactly like what one of the other nurses says about her own boyfriend....REPEATEDLY. So I think this beautiful woman wants to draw my sexy hands but instead she wants to paint a picture of my sad, sad ass. "

Enid walks over to Mike solemn and as careful as can be as if she is a bird walking on a power line. She puts both hands on his face as she sits on his lap and makes out for a solid 2 minutes. She opens her eyes when she finishes and stares into his and starts laughing hysterically, "Mike, you are such an adorably, clueless, jackass! You thought I wanted to draw your HANDS??? Is that what you think women do, scour the internet for hand porn? Here is another helpful hint about women...When she pulls your underwear down to spank you and asks which three women between her or her friends think you are sexy the three answers are always Her, her and HER. Yes, I used the Lily commentary to throw you off, but you know what Mike? I want you to do unspeakable weird things to my wild untamed butt worse than what Lily's boyfriend does... And your spanking, I honestly thought that was your kink and I was throwing you some curveballs to break you out of your shell. You can be so confident and authoritative in some moments of your life, but you are terrified of women. I thought my soft approach dominatrix style is exactly what you needed and you know what maybe I was messing with you a bit. Your life got out of control and you needed a reset!"