Charlie paced the perimeter of his pasture. Something was wrong, he could feel it. He hadn’t seen Marissa, except on a device he had seen her use here on the farm, since the night some strangers came around and did something to him that made him go to sleep. When he woke up, she was gone. Then one day, Bill brought something to him that had her on it. He didn’t understand it, but he heard her talking to him. She looked awful, which worried him even more.

Finally, he made a decision. He had to find her, so he jumped the fence and ran to the lane way. Everyone was ensconced in their chores, so nobody saw him leave. He trotted down the lane and turned right onto the road, heading toward the highway.

At lunch, Stan asked if anyone had seen the steer. Charlie wasn’t in his pasture when he’d gone to feed him. While it wasn’t unusual for him to jump his fence and go visit the humans or cows, he was *always* in his pasture at feeding time.

Nobody had seen the massive bovine. Bill and Stan decided to go looking for Charlie after lunch. God forbid something had happened to him – their little sister would be devastated. The brothers were very protective of Marissa, especially because of her rough start in life but now also because of what she’d been through recently. It had been all they could do to resist beating the cartel members that came to the house to within an inch of their lives. But they knew that would only get themselves in trouble. Besides, those men were probably low on the totem pole and just doing what they were ordered to do. It was the higher echelon they wanted to see punished.

After the meal was over, the two set out in their vehicles. They could take the time to look for the missing steer since the growing season was over and the harvest in. Not that it mattered, they’d have taken the time even it was the middle of haying or planting. The children were in school and they hoped to have Charlie back before the young ones got home. The kids loved the gentle giant and Charlie loved them. He seemed to have an affinity for the young of any species.

At the road, Stan turned right and Bill set out in the opposite direction. Stan headed toward the highway, stopping at every house on the way. Nobody he found at home had seen Charlie, until he got to the last farm before the highway. “Yep, I sure did see him” Hap Anderson said. “He was going at quite a clip, too. I figured he had a friend he was on his way to see.” Most people on this part of the road knew about Charlie and his penchant for fence jumping.

“I wish that was it”, Bill responded.

“Maybe it is. He might have a lady friend you don’t know about.”

Bill laughed. “He’s a steer so he can’t do anything, but I hope you’re right, Hap. There will be no consoling my sister if Charlie has run away”. He gave Hap his phone number in case he saw Charlie again, though Bill was doubtful that he would.

Later, at supper, the younger ones asked where the bovine was. They had gone to his pasture after doing their chores as they did most school days. Upon finding him absent, they searched the farm, thinking that the steer might be visiting some of the livestock, but he could not be found.

“Charlie is on a very special mission”, Stan replied, unable to bear telling them that Marissa’s pet was missing. “And it’s top secret, so I can’t tell you what it is.”

“Stan, don’t lie to the children. How can they be taught to always tell the truth if they are lied to?”

“You’re right, Vicky”, Stan conceded and went on to tell the youngsters what had happened. He kept his tone lighter than he felt, reassuring them that Charlie would come home when he accomplished whatever it was that he had set out to do. He fervently hoped Charlie did come back – he knew what it would do to his sister if she never saw her precious pet again, and she had been through so much already.

Later, after the children were in bed, Bill, Stan, Vicky and Patsy discussed whether to tell Marissa that Charlie had taken off. The consensus was to consult with their parents who were with their sister and had better knowledge of her emotional state. Bill texted Gael and asked him to call them when they left the hospital for the night. Gael texted right back, asking if everything was okay. “There’s a situation w/ Charlie and we need to know if Goober is strong enough to handle knowing. He’s not ill, so don’t worry about that”, Bill texted.

Gael called Bill as soon as he and Irene got into the car later in the evening. He put it on speaker so his wife could participate in the discussion. Bill had gone home by then but his siblings said they would go along with whatever their parents suggested.

First, Bill reassured his mother and father that everything else was fine at home. Then he told them about Marissa’s bovine running away and that Charlie was last seen on the highway. “Oh, God”, Irene lamented. “This is going to devastate her.”

“Do you think she can handle the news?” Bill asked.

Gael and Irene hesitated. “I don’t know”, his mother replied. “Maybe we should ask Braxton or Dr Cameron.”

“Great idea, Reenie”, her husband said to her. “We can ask Braxton in the morning.”

They talked more about Marissa’s progress and what was going on on the farm before saying good night.

The next morning, the Brennans had a discussion with Braxton and Dr. Cameron. They came to the agreement to hold off on telling Marissa about Charlie’s disappearance until she was stronger.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Three days after setting out on his journey, travelling southeast, Charlie reached the American border. The behemoth bovine was now in Saskatchewan and crossed in a wide open field as the province did not have a lot of forest to hide in. Instinctively, he wanted to avoid Customs. He didn’t know why they were to be avoided, he just felt it. He veered East, hoping that it would lead him to Marissa.

But the feeling didn’t last long. He woke up from a nap the next day, certain that his human wasn’t there any longer, wherever “there” was. Rising and relieving himself, he waited for his instinct to kick in and tell him where to go. He nibbled at some grass, but his heart wasn’t in it. Sleeping in grassy fields gave him some safety, since members of his species were expected to be in pastures.

He had had a near miss the day he left his pasture. He was travelling along a highway and a group of people tried to rope him. Charlie jumped a fence and ran into the woods. After that, he only went onto a road after dark when there were far fewer humans out and about. He had never been abused by humans, but something told him not to trust people he didn’t know.

After eating some more and chewing his cud, Charlie headed south. He was sure this route would take him to Marissa.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“You *have* to tell her”, Bill Brennan said to his father. They were video chatting, discussing whether to tell Marissa about Charlie being missing. Gael knew it would break his baby’s heart and he couldn't bear to do that to her. But he knew it had to be done. They had given it a week and there was still no sign of Marissa’s pet.

“All right”, he replied with a sigh. “Your mother and I will do it today. I’ll wait until Braxton comes back this afternoon so he can be there to help if she breaks down.” He and Bill said goodbye and he finished dressing to go to the hospital.

“You’re doing the right thing”, Irene said to him. “If it was one of the children and you were away, you would be furious if we didn’t tell you until you returned home.”

“It’s not…” Gael started to say but was cut off by his wife.

“It is the same to her”, Irene said. “She loves that steer more than any other pet she’s had. Maybe even more than she loves us – or at least as much.”

“You’re right, Reenie, but she needs to stop getting attached to livestock.”

Irene cleared her throat. “One word, husband – Becky” she reminded him, referencing his favourite cow, which he’d already determined would live her life out on the farm at the end of her milking days. Gael’s sheepish look told her he was sufficiently chastised.

“You are right, woman”, he said as he took her in his arms for a hug. “But we’ll do it after Braxton gets back from the Maynard’s this afternoon.”

“I’m always right”, the Brennan matriarch replied. “Come on, let’s get going.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Braxton got up from his chair when Gael and Irene entered the room. Marissa was drinking a coffee. The hospital coffee tasted like swamp water, so he usually got her one from the cafe downstairs. She missed her Tim Horton’s aka “Timmie’s”-, a large hugely successful Canadian chain and considered a national icon.

“How was your night, Rissa?” Gael asked.

“Pretty good”, she replied, sounding in good spirits. Gael hated that they were going to tell her something that would crush those good spirits like a bug under his foot. He looked at his wife, silently pleading with her to hold off for a few days. They had such great unspoken communication, Irene knew what he was asking and shook her head “no”.

Gael, resigned to breaking his daughter’s heart, told Braxton he’d accompany him to the hospital’s front door. On the way, he’d tell Marissa’s friend that they were going to tell her about Charlie’s disappearance that afternoon when he got back. “Do you think she can handle it?”, he asked the psychologist.

“She can but it’s going to be extremely hard on her”, Braxton replied. “She is very attached to that steer.”

“Yes, but we are a farm family – animals are dying all the time. She’s no stranger to it. She’s lost a couple pet dogs, though admittedly she’s never got that attached to livestock, just her horses – until Charlie came along.”

“Your daughter is a very strong woman, Gael”, his new friend said. “Look at all she’s been through and she’s gotten through it. She’ll get through this.”

“I hope and pray you’re right, Braxton. I hope you are right.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Back in Marissa’s room, Irene was trying to keep Marissa calm. She was no fool and she knew something was up, though she didn’t know what. Her father never walked Braxton downstairs to the door. That could only mean he wanted to talk about her and didn’t want her to hear. She couldn’t imagine what it was. Was her cancer progressing? She’d had some scans a few days ago but had not got the results yet. “Mama, is my cancer getting worse?” she asked Irene.

“I don’t know, honey, we haven’t got the results of your tests yet.”

“Then what is Daddy talking to Braxton about? Is he going to leave?” she asked, her voice trembling.

“Oh, no, sweetie, he’s not leaving. He cares way too much about you”, Irene reassured her. “Are you finished your coffee? Why don’t you lie down for a while and have a rest?”

Marissa knew her mother was keeping something from her but she also knew there was no prying it out of her when she was determined to keep it a secret. She lay back in her bed and sighed. Despite her best intentions, she fell asleep. She was still weak and tired easily. When she woke up, her father was in the room.

“Maybe you will tell me what’s going on, Daddy”, she said with exasperation. “Mama won’t say a thing.”

“And neither will I, until Braxton gets back.” He was tempted to say Enjoy this time before your world comes tumbling down, but he kept quiet. He didn’t want to upset her until he had to.

When the lunch trays came, the Brennans tried to get Marissa to eat. All they could get her to do was have a few bites of her toast and drink coffee.

Braxton returned to the hospital earlier than usual. “I couldn’t sleep”, he explained.

“Maybe YOU will tell me what is going on!” Marissa exclaimed. “Nobody else will!” She glared at her parents.

Braxton shared a look with Gael and Irene that said Now is the time, let’s not put it off any more, and said to Gael “I think you should be the one to tell her since you are her father. I’m just here for moral support.”

Gael sat down on the bed and took his daughter’s good hand in his. “Baby, I have to tell you Ssomething. Now, please don’t jump to conclusions – we don’t know that anything bad has happened, just that he’s disappeared.”

“Who?” she asked, her face wary.

Gael took in a deep breath. “Charlie”, he said. Everyone’s eyes were on Marissa.

“Ok, Daddy”, she said. “Joke time’s over. You got me.”

“This is no joke, honey”, Irene said. “Charlie has gone missing. Your brothers have searched and searched for him, the kids made flyers to post, they have even put ads in the paper. We don’t know where he is.”

Marissa looked at her mother, trying to process what she’d just been told. Her beloved Charlie had disappeared. No, she wouldn’t believe it. Charlie wouldn’t do that to her. “No, Mama, Charlie wouldn’t run away on me.”

“It’s true, baby”, Gael told her. “Bill and Stan wouldn’t lie.” Marissa gave her father a look that said “Yeah, right”. “Seriously, Rissa. You know your brothers love you and know how attached you are to Charlie. They may tease you but they would not deliberately hurt you.” He could see a tear making it’s way down her cheek.

Braxton had been watching, letting the Brennans handle telling Marissa about the missing bovine. Now, he felt it was time to move in. She was in denial and he need to put a stop to it. If he didn’t it would be even harder to get her to accept it if Charlie never came back. “Let me try”, he said to them. Gael got up off the bed and Braxton sat down. “Do you think I’d lie to you, Marissa?” he asked.

“No, of course not”, she replied in a small voice. “You’re right, I wouldn’t.” Braxton took her hand in his and with his other hand wiped a wisp of hair from her face. “Charlie is missing, honey. He was seen running along the highway.”

Marissa started to cry. “I can’t … I can’t handle not seeing him again!” she wailed, looking into Braxton’s blue eyes.

“Who said you won’t see him again? He just might come home when he’s accomplished whatever it is he’s doing. Don’t give up so easily.”

“Braxton is right”, Irene butted in. “We don’t know what Charlie is up to, so don’t think the worst.”

Just then there was a knock at the door and Gideon Maynard walked in. “Why all the sad faces?” he asked. “You’re crying, Marissa. Why?”

“Charlie’s gone!” she blurted out in response. “Nobody knows where he is!” She reached for the tissues and Irene handed her the box. She had brought her daughter some toiletries, including decent facial tissue as the hospital’s was like sand paper.

“What do you mean by ‘gone’?” Gideon asked and Gael told him about what he’d been told by his adult children at home. When he’d finished recounting what he knew, the doctor had a pained look on his face. He had an interest in the steer but more than that, Charlie was Marissa’s beloved pet and him being missing could negatively affect his patient’s recovery. “What do you suppose got into him?” he asked Gael.

“I don’t know, Gideon. He’s never taken off before, but life has been up and down for him lately, with Rissa being home, then away then home then away again. It’s got to be confusing for him.” He was angry at his daughter’s bovine for taking off, but he didn’t want to voice his feelings for fear of upsetting her more.

Marissa pushed her covers back and tried to get out of bed. “Where are you going?” her father asked.

“To find Charlie”, she answered. “I can’t lie here and do nothing. Braxton, please move”, she said as she pushed on his one knee that was on the bed with the foot hanging over.

“Marissa, you can’t get up on your own without crutches – you know that”, Gideon reminded her. “And yours aren’t here.”

“Then get me some! Please.” There was a look of determination on her face.

“Not right now. You need physical therapy to help you get back to walking. You can’t just waltz out of here and go running after your steer. How would you look for him? You don’t know where he is or where he went after Mr Anderson saw him.”

“You’re right, Dr Maynard”, Marissa replied with a dejected tone of voice. It’s going to be so hard to lie here and not do anything.”

“I know. We’ll try to keep you busy. I’ll send Dr Cameron in later to chat with you, but in the meantime, I think you should get some rest. I’m sure your parents could use a break.”

When everyone else had left the room, Braxton lay down behind Marissa, holding her tight. He said a silent prayer that Charlie would be found safe. He was afraid of what it would do to this woman who meant so much to him if he wasn’t.